Standing On A Chair

Telling it like I see it…

On A Very Big Mistake

Some readers have said my recent post “On Infidelity” wasn’t funny like some of my previous efforts.  In my normal, calm reserve, I respond with, “What in the flying fuck is funny about infidelity!?”

And guess what else isn’t funny.  I was once “the other woman.”  How sick is that?  You’d think with my history of first-hand exposure to men cheating on their women, I’d sooner have my left breast removed without benefit of anesthesia than to participate in such deceit! 

But no.

I met this married man on the work-site.  He was a member of the Board of the company I worked for.  I fell smack in love with him practically at first sight.  Without boring you with a lot of details, I’ll say that our clandestine relationship lasted a full year, after which he left his wife and we moved in together.

Not many illicit affairs end in this fashion.  And looking back, I wish mine had not.  Because such a relationship is doomed from the beginning.  You kid yourself in lots of ways.  At first you think you won, because he left her for you.  You’re convinced that you are the woman who will make him an honest man.  The wife he was cheating on while he was seeing you?  Well, she just failed.  Or he didn’t really love her like he loves you.


What you ultimately end up with is a consistent, underlying fear that it’s only a matter of time before he does it to you.

And he does.

I try not to have regrets.  Can’t change what is.  But is there a lesson learned here?  You bet there is.  A man can’t cheat unless he has a woman to cheat with.  We’re all complicit in this.  And what if all the women in the world refused to participate?  Well, I guess we’d see a jump in the prostitution business.

Some may say, “This is much ado about nothing.  It’s been going on forever, and will continue to go on forever.  It will never change.  Accept it.”

Maybe so.

But I say it is not much ado about nothing.  Too many people are devastated by infidelity.  Shouldn’t we change the rules, for God’s sake?  So everybody can stop telling lies?  So everybody can stop making promises they won’t keep?

Instead of marriage being a lifetime commitment, why don’t we just require contract renewals every few years?

I don’t know. 

Remember, this is my take on the thing.  Just sayin’


November 16, 2010 - Posted by | A Very Big Mistake | , , , , ,


  1. Yah! Contract renewals. That’s funny!

    Comment by Farrah | November 16, 2010 | Reply

  2. I found this blog from Facebook, and glad I did. Very entertaining and insightful. On the subject of infidelity, I have always been a one woman man. It makes life easier for me.

    Comment by Adrian Lee | December 3, 2010 | Reply

    • Thank you for your comment. It’s great to know you appreciated the blog. Plus, one-women-men are hard to come by! So happy you’re that!

      Comment by standingonachair | December 3, 2010 | Reply

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